Having a bit of a hard time today. Well, the last few days, really. Not sure why. Holiday blues? Maybe.
You ever just sit there for hours, trying to get up the motivation to do something? Meanwhile, you almost can’t breathe? Like, you can’t draw a full breath?
Don’t get me wrong – I’ve done stuff today. Got up, spent an hour on the treadmill, another 30 minutes doing squats and lunges and weights. Ran to Michael’s to get something I needed to make my sister something, and worked on that project. Looked for jobs. Made lunch. And dinner.
I haven’t been on Match in…two weeks? I was talking to several guys before I went out of town last week, but I can’t seem to get up the urge to call any of them. In fact, I am quite done with internet dating right now. I’m just over it.
I did go out with a couple of girlfriends last night, and had a wonderful time. But afterwards, instead of feeling energized, I felt even more like crawling into a hole.
I want to be able to afford a new pair of shoes – actually, two. A replacement pair for my favorite ones, now falling apart, and a pair of snazzy boots.
MercuryKitty may be sick. He’s been drinking a lot of water lately, even the person watching him while I was gone was concerned. What I’m reading on the internet is possibly kidney failure or diabetes. Taking him to the vet tomorrow, and hoping for the best.
Already sick of the GD Kay/Jared commercials. Yes, I’m alone for Christmas this year. No boyfriend, husband, or child to get me a sparkly diamond something or other. Thanks so very much for the reminder. Also sick of car commercials. Who the hell buys someone a car for Christmas? Next up: holiday tv shows and movies about Christmas miracles and happily ever after. Bite me.
I know, I know. There are people far worse off than I am. I know this. I try very hard to remind myself that things are not that bad, they could be worse, and to be happy for the things I do have. It’s just been a really crappy year, and I’m ready for it to be over. I don’t know that I’ve ever said that before. My advent calendar isn’t counting down the days until Christmas, it’s counting down the days until 2011.