Tag Archives: friends

How to be happy – a sidenote (via Today I’m happy…)

One of my goals this year is finding happiness in every day, and as part of that, I’m also providing some research, articles, thoughts, etc, on how to be happy on my other blog, DelightfullyHappy. Here is a post from yesterday, a recap of the Oprah show on happiness.

How to be happy - a sidenote What does it take to be happy?  Love?  Kids?  A good job?  Money?  Does what you do for a living make a difference?  What about where you live? This blog was started as a way to recognize happiness in every day, but I also intended to share snippets of wisdom, articles, and book reviews.  Today is the first of those “sidenotes.” Today, Oprah had Goldie Hawn on the show, and they were talking happiness.  It turned out to be a good all-around happi … Read More

via Today I’m happy…

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Delightful Year, Continued

As I mentioned in this post, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to continue my “Picture a Day” project for 2011, but I did want to work on taking better pictures.

But then, I discovered that taking a picture each day is second nature now.  So I’m continuing the project, although I ‘m not guaranteeing a picture for each day, because some of my days I don’t even leave the house.  But I will be doing pictures most days.

January is mostly updated – you can view it here.

Also, I evidently inspired my friend GeauxGirl to challenge herself to a picture a day.  You can view her photos here.

Emotional Math

Lots of future posts floating around in my head right now.  I’ll organize my thoughts and get to them all sooner or later.  In the meantime, I just read a wonderful post by IzzieDarling:

  • Just because … I can’t see doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Often times, we are irritated and impatient with others when we believe they are beating a dead horse, not moving fast enough, lazy, playing the victim. Guilty. Add compassion.
  • Just because … you find yourself “lost” does not mean you will not be “found”. Subtract despair, multiply hope.
  • Just because … you face the unknown on all fronts does not mean anything other than you may be at the doorstep of the best life you’ve ever known. Negative thinking is easy. Divide it into smithereens, erase, and add amazing possibilities to each and every half empty glass in your possession.

Read more here:  Just Because: Do the Math.

Ghosts of boyfriends past

Photo by katmere

I got a call yesterday on a job I had applied for last week.  I had a brief phone interview with a woman who I think was HR, because she said she was going to “resubmit” my resume to the hiring manager, and I may or may not get a call back for an interview.  Great news, right?

Here’s the bad news.  The office is literally directly across the street from my ex-boyfriend’s house.  You could probably see his house from the office.

Why do we attach so much emotion to things like this?  Like, where we met someone, or where we had our first kiss, or what we ate on our 49th date?  Why do we have places we can’t go to because they remind us of that person?

ABC Restaurant is just a restaurant.  I’ve been there a million times.  In fact, I’ve been there with at least 5 different guys.  So why is it that whenever I go there, I think of Mr. X?  I’ve watched XYZ TV show for years, since before Mr. X and I started dating and broke up.  So why do I think of him every time I watch it?  I’ve tied my shoes by myself since I was 6 years old.  Why does tying them now make me think of Mr. X?  (These are basic example, people, not necessarily my specific experiences.  I don’t actually think of my ex when I tie my shoe, okay?)

And it’s not even that everything makes you think of your most recent ex.  I think of my college boyfriend any time I go to the zoo.  I think of Colorado Boyfriend every time it snows.  I think of one of my high school boyfriends every time I eat fortune cookies.  I think of Soccer Guy every time I see his college’s emblem…which is the same college my last ex supported, so why would I attach it to a guy I dated 6 years ago and not to the most recent one?

We attach memories to things, places, foods, smells, songs, thoughts.  Then those memories haunt us.  Why?  Why do this to ourselves, why let these things have that much control over us?

And it’s not just exes!  It’s parents, and grandparents, and siblings, and kids, and friends, and jobs.  Some memories are good, some are bad.  Some make you smile through tears, of either joy or sorrow, and some make you want to rip your heart out so you can just stop thinking about them.

Yeah, a little Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind wouldn’t be so bad, on occasion.

What things have memories attached to them in your life?  Do the memories make you smile or cringe?  What have you done to get past those memories?

2010 Effigy

A few years ago my friend Jen introduced us to a new New Year’s Eve custom:  The making of an effigy, things you want to leave behind with the change of the year, and the burning of said effigy.

I am quite proud of my effigy this year.  I used my “Imaginary boyfriend” bumper sticker for the body, cards that The Pilot had given me for arms and legs, and, of course, a picture of him for his head.  Then I filled his body with other things I want to leave behind me (car troubles, sick kitty) and other bad things that happened this year (getting laid off).  There’s a penny I pressed in Tahoe for The Pilot in his hand.  I had a card I had bought him, that’s where the plane comes from. 

I can’t wait to burn this thing. 

See some other great effigies here.

(Edited to add:)

The first day of the rest of my life

This year has really been shit all around.  And I feel bad saying that, because part of this year hasn’t been all that bad.  The first two months were, obviously, difficult.  March and April were…okay.  Most of the summer was pretty good, actually – really not a lot to complain about.

But yesterday.  Yesterday was…well, I don’t want to say bad.  It could be really great, I don’t know yet.  The world is wide open at this point.

Yesterday we had our third (or is it fourth?) layoff this year at work.  And this time I got hit.  After seven years with the company.  Seems sales are low, so they’ve decided to lay off roughly 15-20 support staff.  While they’re hiring approximately 20 new salespeople.

My question, of course, is who the hell is going to do all the work once these people actually start selling?  And if the current 60 sales people can’t sell anything, what makes you think the new 20 will?

Well, I don’t have to worry about that anymore.

I’m okay.  Really.  At least that’s what I’m telling myself right now.

Ask me again later.

I know that this may get me out of my rut.  That it may lead to something truly amazing.  I get that, I’m all over that.  But in the meantime, I have the worry of being a single-income household, with no one else to help cover..mortgage…power…gas…food…

But I’m not thinking about that today.  I’m doing what I planned on doing today anyway.  I had already planned on taking today, tomorrow, and Friday off to essentially bulldoze my house.  So that’s what I’m doing.  I’m thinking only about what to keep and what to send to Goodwill.  I’m not thinking about next week.  Or next month.

Just today.

In the meantime, I have some really great friends.  I called my friend geauxgirl when I left work yesterday, about 10:45.  “How do you feel about having a drink before 11am?” I asked.

She instantly knew something was up, agreed to a drink without hesitation, then I told her I had been laid off.  She left work and was at my side immediately, and all day.  She and her husband have been there for me more than once, and I appreciate them more than they know.  I don’t know what I did to deserve such solid friends! (Love you guys!)

And now, how about a little joke?

This is the first time I’ve been laid all year!  🙂

Groan away.

The mundane of the day

  • I’ve recently found a new method of dealing with The Knee.  Spend about 40 minutes walking, under 3mph, while surfing the internet, checking email, facebook, match, etc.  (Hey, you try typing and using a mouse when you’re walking over 3 mph.)  Ice knee.  Do some stuff around the house for a couple of hours.  Back on the treadmill, load up video on Netflix or Hulu, and run/walk for 30-40 minutes, with breaks to do some arm work.  Ice knee.  So far, it’s done pretty good, I’ve been getting about 3.25 miles in without The Knee acting up.
  • Made it to 4 miles on the treadmill today.  The Knee (I should probably name it) did not particularly care for the last half mile.
  • I saw photos of my Denver Ex at a wedding.  I’ve been kind of lurking on his friends blog, and he posted some photos.  The Ex looks good.  The same.  I…I don’t really know what more to say.  I don’t miss him.  But I do.  I think I just miss those early days with him, before the move, before…everything went to shit.  Nostalgia.
  • Speaking of exes…I noticed The Pilot’s friend looked at my profile on match a couple of weeks ago.  Thought that was pretty funny.  Not necessarily funny-haha….
  • I had a nice date last night with a new guy.  We were in NoDa for dinner and stopped by The Dog Bar.  Dogs like him, so I guess that’s a plus in his column.  We’ll see.
  • I really want to re-tile my bathroom – walls and floors.  I’d love to put some mosaic tiles on the walls, but I worry that it’ll go out of style by the time I decide to sell, and it won’t show well. 
  • It’s funny how we go about our lives.  Today is just another Saturday, but it isn’t.  I forget that, then I remember, and I feel…bad…for forgetting.  Then I get busy doing something and I forget again.  Nine Years.  I still remember that feeling.  I got out of the shower, flipped on the news, turned to walk away, wondering why they were showing footage of Oklahoma City.  Stopped.  Blinked.  That wasn’t OKC.  Pivot back around, stare at screen, trying to comprehend.  Sink onto couch.  Watch live as the news reporter at the Pentagon, on the phone, stopped talking, then said, “Oh my god.”  Watch live as the Towers fell.  Feeling numb.  Eyes filled with tears, but not actually crying.  Too numb to actually cry.  That’s how I still feel.  Like I’m in suspended disbelief.
  • But life goes on.  Off to take a shower, then heading uptown.  Food, beer, football, and friends.  I can’t think of a better way to spend a Saturday night.
  • Love to all.  Look around you – these are the people that count.

Friday FunDay

A compilation of a few emails I’ve had recently:

(1)

I told you I’ve been emailing that guy at work, and we’ve written some long, in depth emails. We were talking about the beach, and he said: “There’s something about being at the beach in the winter, barefoot and in blue jeans, and not seeing anyone almost as far as the eye can see in either direction. Especially when it’s a little windy. Being by the sea can make you feel so connected and so separated all at once, if that makes sense….When you’re alone at the beach, I think it feels like that part of the world is just for you – like, no one else is experiencing that part of the sea at that particular moment. Everything from one horizon to the other, and everything in between. I love that feeling.”

Damn if he didn’t hit the nail on the head. I had to write it down somewhere, because it’s perfect. “You feel so connected and so separated all at once.” Beautiful.

(2)

My lovely friends and I had another great, humorous email chain going this week. It started off with a serious discussion about kids and entitlement, and then it went somewhere else, and I said, “Email Hijack!” Someone else attached the wonderful, fabulous, hysterical picture of the bunny with a pancake on his head. I then found out (because my friends are so darn smart) that this bunny’s name is Oolong, and he is famous for balancing things on his head. Evidently there was some controversy over this bunny, with animal rights activists saying that making the bunny balance things on his head was animal cruelty. You know what that means, right? You can no longer teach your dog to sit, shake, or roll over. Because it’s animal cruelty.

(3)

The fun email week ended late in the day today with an email conversation with my friend, The Bartender. We were discussing another friend of ours who orders Philly Cheese steaks with no onions and no peppers. I mentioned that I don’t like those things either, which is why I don’t order Philly Cheese steaks, because when you take away a key ingredient, it’s no longer what it was. I gave the example of ordering spaghetti and meatballs, without the meatballs, and hold the tomato sauce. My friend: “It’s like when I order a hot woman with issues, but hold the issues.” Me: “Yes – You’ve just taken away the entire flavor of the dish.” Him: “So what flavor are you?”

My response: “I would say I’m one of those dishes that’s in the comfort food category….like Chicken & Dumplings. Only with a dash or two of cayenne, or maybe chipotle Tabasco, to (although I hate the phrase as used by Emeril) kick it up a notch. Enough to give you a good taste, but not enough to burn your taste buds off, and depending on your tolerance to spicy food, I’ll either suit you just fine or burn your a$$. But if you leave that bit of heat off, the dish is just a little too bland, so you just have to take your chances that it’s the right amount of heat.” (Of course, I also should have added that I might not be enough spice for you…you know, for those guys who just LOVE the crazy girls.)

Have I mentioned lately that I love my friends? They keep me sane at work!

Enjoy your weekend,

Delightful Eccentric

What do God, The Robot, and Lindsay Lohan have in common?

Was digging through some emails the other day at work and found this lovely chain between me and a couple of friends. These people seriously keep me sane some days.

(Names changed to genderless names to protect the (not so) innocent. I don’t think there’s anything in this to give anyone away, but if you are Nic, Chris, Taylor, or Terry and don’t want this posted publicly, just email me – I’ll take it down!)

Chris: Saw this church sign on the way to work “He who answers you Controls you.” WTF??

Nic: He who answers you controls you. That is…I’m not sure what that is. So if I answer my boss, does that mean I control her? Ha – that’s humorous.

Chris: My first thought: “So they’re finally admitting that the invention of religion and God is just to control the masses!” Probably not what they had in mind with that…

Taylor: Since I’m answering this e-mail, does that now mean I Control you? I’m concentrating on you doing the robot right now. Let me know if it worked.

Chris: I just got the strangest urge to pop & lock.

Terry: What constitutes an answer? A burning bush?

Chris: What does Lindsay Lohan have to do with any of this?

Terry: NICE! It doesn’t have anything to do with Amy Winehouse either for that matter.

Chris: Hee hee. I’m trying so hard not to giggle that my eyes are watering.

My life’s okay

Blog post in haiku:

My life’s okay,

Have Job, Home, Food, Health, Friends –

It could be worse.

Seriously. I realize that there are people far worse off than I am, and that my problems and issues don’t add up to spoonful of the heaping mess that some people deal with.

I’m employed, and have money in the bank, and can pay my bills and have some spending money. I own my own home, and don’t have to worry about where my next meal is going to come from.

I’m college educated, have reliable transportation, electricity and running water.

I am healthy, disease free, with no real physical or mental limitations.

I’ve never had a man hit me. I’ve never had to deal with date rape or unwanted pregnancy or a psycho stalker. I’ve never had to deal with divorce and custody battles and child support. I’ve never had to deal with the death of a child.

I have a loving family that I get along with quite well. I have friends who care about me, who would (and have) jump in their car in the middle of the night to rescue me from the side of the road, who would offer me a place to stay and food and clothes off their back if I needed it.

I know all this. Which is why I feel really bad when I have my “Woe is Me” moments. Oh, boohoo, I can’t afford a trip to Europe. Oh, boohoo, I can’t afford a new car. Oh, boohoo, my boyfriend cheated on me and dumped me (although, does it count as being dumped if he just disappeared?). Oh, boohoo, I don’t get to go out to eat as often as I would like. Oh, boohoo, some days I don’t like my job very much. Oh, boohoo, I can’t run 3 miles in 30 minutes.

Boo-freaking-hoo.

I get it.

Doesn’t mean I don’t want things to be better.

The head can say it all day long, yell and scream and shout through a bullhorn, but the heart, the soul, the core of you doesn’t always listen, or pay attention to reason.

Sucks, don’t it?

What do you boohoo about, even though you know it could be worse?