Category Archives: NaBloPoMo

Dear 16 Year Old Me

The NaBloPoMo prompt for Thursday was, “If you could go back in time and meet your 16 year old self, what three things would you tell yourself?

Now, I’m sure this was meant to be a very serious subject, and the three things should be something like, “Don’t take life too seriously, Don’t date that one guy,  and Invest wisely.”

Bet on the Patriots to win the Superbowl in 2002.  Put a lot of money on it.

Bet on the Sox to win the 2004 World Series.  Put a lot of money on it.

The winning lotto numbers for XX drawing are:

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Freedom (I won’t let you down)

Today’s NaBloPoMo writing prompt was “Freedom,” but all I can think about is the George Michael song. I think on the word, and I start singing. So now, using my freedom to not write a blog post about freedom based on a random prompt, I give you:

Think I’m gonna get me some happy.

(Also – That chick has some serious STOMP ability.  Tyra would be proud.)

He glittered when he walked

I remember when I first read the poem Richard Cory, by E.A. Robinson.  I was in 10th grade, in a creative writing class, and my teacher passed the poem out to the class.  I was reading it as the papers were still being passed out, and I was one of the first to reach the end.

I gasped. The teacher smiled.

Whenever Richard Cory went down town,
We people on the pavement looked at him:
He was a gentleman from sole to crown,
Clean favored, and imperially slim.
And he was always quietly arrayed,
And he was always human when he talked;
But still he fluttered pulses when he said,
“Good-morning,” and he glittered when he walked.
And he was rich, richer than a king,
And admirably schooled in every grace:
In fine, we thought that he was everything
To make us wish that we were in his place.
So on we worked, and waited for the light,
And went without the meat, and cursed the bread;
And Richard Cory, one calm summer night,
Went home and put a bullet through his head.

I still have the poem memorized.  It still gives me chills.  People are not always as they appear to be.

When I grow up I wanna be your girl

What did you want to be when you grew up?  I never had a real desire to be anything.  I’m sure at some point I wanted to be a princess and an actress and a singer and a model, because almost all little girls want to be those things when they were young.  Come to think of it, I still wouldn’t mind being a princess. 

In middle school I wanted to be a lawyer, but I think that was more because 3 of my closest friends said they wanted to be a lawyer, so I did, too.    

In high school, I wanted to be a writer.  I still do, but I don’t put in the effort I should.  I’m lazy that way. 

In college I wanted to be a teacher. 

Truth is, I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.  I like my job, but it’s a job, not a career.  There’s not a specific job I want, a title I’m working for, a career goal I have.  I feel bad about that sometimes, that I don’t have more drive, more goals.  I just want to be happy doing what I’m doing, regardless of what that is.  I don’t want to hate going to work every day.  I’ve been there.  It sucks.  And as much as I may bitch about my job sometimes, I actually like the job, I just don’t like the corporate environment I end up in sometimes.  I don’t do office politics well, I simply don’t have the time, energy, or bullshit factor for it.

You know that interview question, “Where do you see yourself in 5 years?”  I hate that question.  I don’t see myself in 5 years.  There’s not a dream or goal I have in mind, a picture in my head about where I want to be.  Ideally, I’d like to be on a beach drinking a mojito, independently wealthy without a care in the world, but interviewers don’t want to hear that. 

I can’t help but start singing Kasey Chambers’ “Pony” when I say “When I grow up.”  Have a listen:

When I grow up I want a pony.  When I grow up I want a baby.  When I grow up I want a cowboy.  When I grow up I’ll be a lady.

Refocus

I’m sick to death of having nothing on my mind except dating and the betrayal I still feel over my last relationship.  I know I used to blog about other things, but for the life of me I can’t seem to focus on anything else.  I sit down, start a new post, and stare at the screen, fingers poised over the keyboard, searching my mind for something, anything.

So, in an effort to force my brain elsewhere, I’m going to do NaBloPoMo this month.  I’m not guaranteeing a post every day, but I am going to work very hard at posting something other than my dating life.

It’ll be nice to get my mind on other things.