What’s different

I’ve always, always, needed my own time.  Space, Me Time, time not spent together.  Time and space to breathe, to be alone with my thoughts, to not have to work on The Relationship.  That’s one of things I enjoyed about my relationship with The Pilot – I had all the Me Time I needed, and I didn’t have to feel guilty about not spending time with him.  Even with family and close friends, there’s only so much time I can spend with them before needing to breathe.

But this relationship…it’s different.  We’re together all the time, and I enjoy it.  I don’t need space.  I can breathe just fine.  I have yet to need time apart.

I’m generally an introvert, unless I’m around my friends.  I’m quiet, go with the flow, reserved.  I’ve almost always dated men more outgoing than me – probably due mostly to the fact that two introverts have a hard time meeting each other, since neither are really putting themselves out there.  I’ve relied on these men to get me out of the house, do things, make me meet new people.

But this relationship…it’s different.  He’s more of an introvert than me.  I’m the one getting us out, getting us to do things, making him meet new people.  It’s been interesting.  And even though he’s an introvert, he’s totally into meeting new people and doing new things – I don’t want to make it sound like he’s anti-social, that’s not it at all.  I’ve come to realize the Space thing and the Social thing are connected.  Introverts need time to “recharge” after social encounters.  Before, I needed that recharging time, which is why I needed my space, but now, since our social time is planned more by me, I can plan it on my own social needs, and recharge when I need to – all without the pressure to still be “on.”  Interesting, huh?

I hate to say it too loud, because it feels like I’m rubbing it in or gloating or something.  I know if I had read what I’m about to write before him, I would roll my eyes and look for a trashbasket to hurl in.  But…

This guy is amazing.  He’s awesome.  He’s not perfect, there’s a couple of things he does that drive me crazy, but overall…yeah, he rocks.  He holds my car door – every single time.  He helps me on with my jacket.  He makes me laugh, and I make him laugh.  He does so much for me, from getting me a glass of water to building a cat box cabinet to taking me to a nice dinner out.  We don’t fight, because he’s more laid back than me and usually will do whatever I want (and by that I mean go to the restaurant I want to go to, see the movie I want to see, go hiking when I want to go hiking, etc – I don’t want to imply that he just blindly follows me around like a puppy dog, because that’s not it at all).

Ladies, he even follows me around the clothing store and holds the clothes I’m going to buy or try on.  I don’t ask – he just holds his hand out and expects to carry them.  (He will not, however, hold my purse – and I’m okay with that.)

It’s funny, sometimes, how things work.  You know, we grew up less than 30 miles away from each other, in Texas?  And we both moved around a bit and ended up here, 1000+ miles away from Texas, and then we met.  And now it looks like we’ll be moving 4500 miles away from here, this time with each other.


(Did you like how I didn’t mention how long it’s been since I blogged?  How I didn’t apologize for that?  Did you notice?)  🙂

4 responses to “What’s different

  1. When might this be happening?

  2. comment from a lurker. awesome news. i was hoping for this. i followed my love to the middle east for his job. if i can live here, you can live there. happy travels.

  3. i feel like we need another blog post to update us. 🙂

    you know, I know exactly how you feel. because when I met Jon – everything was different. And everything was easier. We got married after only 7 months of dating, but now 9 years in – it’s still amazing and easy. i think that when you find the right person for you to spend your life with, it’s like this.

    • delightfuleccentric

      Consider yourself updated. 😉

      See – you were married after seven months of dating – we’ll be just shy of nine months. But it doesn’t feel like nine months – sometimes it feels like two months, with that fun, crazy thrill, and sometimes it feels like years, with that comfort and security. And I think that’s just as it should be.