Waitin’, watchin’ the clock, it’s four o’clock, it’s got to stop Tell him, take no more, she practices her speech As he opens the door, she rolls over Pretends to sleep as he looks her over She lies and says she’s in love with him Can’t find a better man She dreams in color, she dreams in red Can’t find a better man
I love this song. It’s one of the songs I sing along to without even thinking about it. I have for years.
I’ve also applied the song to many a boyfriend. P2. Colorado Boyfriend. A couple of great guys that I just didn’t love, despite wanting to.
I’ve always assumed the song was about an abusive relationship, although it never actually says that. Looking on the internet, I found that Vedder wrote this about his mother’s husband, his stepfather, who was evidently abusive towards his mother.
However, I think it can apply to many non-abusive relationships. Relationships in which a person isn’t happy, and yet they stay. They’re not happy with the state of the relationship, or they don’t really love the person anymore, or they’re simply worried that there’s no one else out there for them.
I want to note, none of my boyfriends were abusive, but I can relate to the other meanings.
I’ve said it before – I don’t believe in settling, not if you’re truly looking for love. I don’t think it’s fair to you, or to the person you’re settling for. If all you want is kids and a family, and that’s what the other person wants, too, and you get along well enough and you both agree that it’s more a business arrangement than a love story, then it’s not really settling at that point. Go for it. But if you want love, and romance, and you’re with someone just because you don’t think you can find anyone else…well, that just seems like a miserable existence to me.
I’ve been there in the short term. I’ve been waiting for a boyfriend to show up, thinking, “I need to end this, this isn’t what I want.” And the guy comes in and I take a breath to start “The Talk,” and I just…can’t. Because what if there is no one better out there for me? Because I don’t want to start the process all over again. Because I’m tired and I just want to be In A Relationship, so I don’t have to keep trying. Because what if I never find someone?
But in the end, I’d rather be happy with myself, the person I am. I’d rather like myself, knowing I didn’t fake it. Regardless of how unhappy I sometimes get being single, I’d rather be happy and alone then with someone and miserable.