Well, I’ve been working on a blog post for over a week now, one of those painful, soul-baring, emotional ones, but now I find I’m hesitant to post it. Throughout the life of this blog, I’ve known that this blog is public and anyone could read it, and particularly within the last 9 months I’ve been aware that The Pilot and/or his girlfriend could read it, but I regarded it as a possibility, not a probability or a definite. Plausible deniability, if you will. But now I’m aware that The Pilot’s friend reads it, and I find I’m not as willing to bare my soul. Odd, huh?
I don’t know, I may still post it. You see, I’ve always thought of the internet as this wonderful thing, giving proof that you are not alone in the world. Whatever problem I may have had, I have almost always been able to find someone else going through the same thing. I’d like to feel like I may have done that for someone else. Plus, as I always say, this is my form of therapy.
There’s a short story by Sandra Cisneros called “Mango Says Goodbye Sometimes.” In it, she says, “I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much. I write it down and Mango says goodbye sometimes. She does not hold me with both arms. She sets me free.” I’ve often felt that way about writing and blogging. That’s why I consider it therapy. Instead of paying someone to listen to me and nod their head and offer paltry non-advice, I type it out and get the input of my peers (for free!).
So, what do you think, Peers? Should I post what I was going to post anyway, or no?