This is an interesting conundrum.  What constitutes indecent exposure?

Obviously, in most parts of the US, women are not allowed to be topless in public.  (Side question:  at what age does this start?  When the female is no longer completely flat-chested?  There are some girls who could still go topless at 16, by that standard.  But, obviously, nobody raises an eyebrow if a 5 year old girl is running around without a shirt on.  It can’t simply be an arbitrary “when they become a sexual object,” because there are some serious freaks out there who look at children and get excited.  Puberty?  Again that’s different for every girl.  So at what age is a female not allowed to run around topless?)

It makes me wonder – what makes breasts sexual objects?  I’ve seen men with some serious natural boobs.  I’ve seen some women that have almost no breasts.  And yet, the woman’s breasts are more of a sexual turn on than the man’s.  So is it only the fact that it’s a woman, as opposed to a man?  What happens when the man in question has some beautiful, well-shaped, womanly looking boobs?  If you put the man in a box where all you can see if the boobs, is that not almost pornographic?  And, once you know it’s a man, does that make the breasts in question less beautiful?  If so, why?

You know that scene in Notting Hill?

Anna Scott: What is it about men and nudity? Particularly breasts? How can you be so interested in them?
William: Well…
Anna Scott: But, but, seriously: they’re just breasts. Every second person in the world has them.
William: Oh, more than that, when you think about it: you know, Meat Loaf has a very nice pair.
Anna Scott: [laughs] But they’re… they’re odd looking, they’re for milk, your mother has them, you’ve seen a thousand of them… What’s all the fuss about?
William: Actually, I can’t think of what it is, really. Let me just have a quick look…
[peeks under blanket]
William: No, no, beats me.

In Rehoboth Beach (and I’m sure a lot of other places), the law states that a woman cannot show her breasts in public.  The law about indecent exposure for men does not include breasts.  Which presented an issue last weekend when some transgendered men ran around topless on the beach, with their implants out in all their glory.

So what happens when a transgendered man with breast implants runs around topless?  Well, they are boobies, but they’re on a man.  So is it indecent?  If yes, then, logically, you’re also saying that a man with huge, natural man-titties is indecent.  Again, logically, if you say it’s indecent for a woman to go topless, and yet a man with implants is indecent, then he is a woman.  

And once you start having to deal with this issue…if boobs make a woman, then what makes a marriage?  Some say “a man and a woman.”  But, again, logically, if boobs make a woman, then is a person with male genitalia (a man) with breast implants (a woman) allowed to marry a man?  Would that be considered “Gay Marriage?”

Ow.  I think I sprained a muscle in my brain.  I know what I’m trying to say, but I don’t know if it’s coming across correctly.  My point is, we, as a nation, as a society, need to get away from the concept that attraction can only exist between a man and a woman.  Or we need to get away from the concept that mammary glands are attractive.  It’s kind of hard to have it both ways.

4 responses to “Boobies!

  1. Well, I think that’s a bit of a false dichotomy, but even so… let the gays get married as long as I can still enjoy boobies.

    • delightfuleccentric

      I know, I REALLY stretched the logic there. It’s just that, things aren’t what they used to be, and people need to get over it.

  2. I think you sprained my brain on that one. Kelly says the fascination comes from a generation of men not being breast fed and it’s caused an obsession. When I was a child the thought was that breast feeding wasn’t the best solution and that formula was better. Personally I think its genetic. Larger breasts may imply better care for offspring or perhaps care for a larger number of offspring at some subconcious level. Or it could just stem from the “Bigger is Better” concept that is an inherent male trait. That idea has its own problems though,..big breasts and sometimes a big booty are acceptable but she has to have a waist the size of a pencil? I’ve never understood that one. Personally I don’t think the size is the key,……That’s what my left brain says. My right brain just says “hehe, boobies”.

  3. Someday we’ll get over ourselves, git nekkid, and sniff each others butts to say hello.

    Hey, while we’re at it, maybe we can figure out how to have another species provide us with free room & board, toys, massages, and even pick up after our poop too!