What a difference a couple of days make.
Maybe it was PMS.
Maybe it was the three glasses of white wine I had that night (white wine tends to make me emotional).
Maybe it was the dam finally breaking.
I was trying so hard to not write about The Pilot and what I was going through, because I didn’t want this blog to be All About Him. But I still needed that release, and I wasn’t really getting it. I had intended to make my last post a private post, but obviously it didn’t happen that way. And I’m okay with that. Because this blog has always been about being my source of therapy, and I obviously needed to get some stuff out. And between letting it out, finally, and people leaving comments and certain things finally registering in my head, I really feel better now. I’ve gone two whole days without tearing up in the car. I saw a plane coming in for landing yesterday and it didn’t completely rip me apart. I’m breathing a bit easier. I noticed that I don’t think about him until I realize I haven’t thought about him. Today, for the first time in a VERY long time, I was happy. I mean, blissful, permanent smile, dancing in my chair, annoyingly, nothing can get me down HAPPY. And it felt good. No, scratch that.
It felt AMAZING.
My coworkers were laughing at me, wondering if I had smoked something at lunch (which I don’t do), asking what was wrong with me. Maybe the correct question is, What is RIGHT with me, finally?
Spring is here, the weather is beautiful, and today is another new beginning. However, I can’t promise I won’t ever again discuss “The Winter of My Discontent.” I can hope not to, but I can’t guarantee anything.
To all of you who have been by my side in action, thought, and comment over the last few months, thank you so much. I appreciate all of you more than you know.
To Better Things-