The End (AKA Part 3)

Read Part 1, if you haven’t, and Part 2, before reading Part 3.  You want the full effect, don’t you?

A little bit of foreshadowing…

  • I noticed, a long while back, that one of The Pilot’s friends on Facebook – one of his female friends – had a profile picture of the two of them together. I asked him who she was. “My cousin in Augusta,” he said.
  • You’ll remember, when we went to Tahoe, that The Pilot had to turn around and go home because his uncle died. Shortly after that trip, I received a call from The Pilot, upset, because he heard from a friend of his that one of my friends was asking questions about him. I found out that the wedding photographer that went to Tahoe worked with a woman who knew The Pilot. This woman said she thought he was dating a woman in Atlanta. I asked The Pilot about it, and he said that he had gone on a couple of dates with a woman in Atlanta, but it was over by the time we got together. He said he went to high school with the woman who said that, and they only spoke about once a year, so it made sense that she may not have accurate information.
  • A few months ago, The Pilot thought I had been cheating on him. The reason isn’t important, but let’s just say that it made sense for him to think that, based on evidence, but that there was actually a reasonable explanation, and I wasn’t cheating on him. We had a heartfelt talk about it. “You know, my ex cheated on me,” he said, “and I still carry that hurt with me, so when I thought you were cheating on me, it just kicked me in the gut.” Understandable.

So, you may have guessed by now. When I logged on to my alternate email on January 22nd, I found a message from the “cousin,” the woman in Atlanta, saying she had read my blog and was wondering why I was writing about her boyfriend. She asked what he had said or done that had led me to believe he and I were in a relationship. Were he and I really just friends, strictly platonic? She asked me, “woman to woman,” what was going on, and I answered her honestly. I asked her some questions of my own, saying that I would appreciate the same, as this has happened to both of us.

I haven’t heard back from her.

He probably told her I was some psychotic stalker who imagined that our friendship was more than that. That’s not the case. I’m not delusional. He told me he loved me. We were sleeping together for a year and a half. I met his friends. He met mine. He met my parents. I thought he was The One, and at one point, not too long ago, we (very hypothetically) discussed marriage.

She also told me that when he came home from Tahoe, it wasn’t because his uncle died, it was because she found out. Found out what, I don’t know. That he wasn’t where he was supposed to be? That he was with another woman? That he was with me, specifically?

I wanted to wait to post any more here, until I heard from her, until I had some closure of my own. But I’ve lost hope of hearing from either her or him, so I’m doing what I need to do for me. I need to move on, but I needed to get this all out first. I will get through this. But part of getting through it involves getting it out, and this is my venue for that. As the tagline says, blogging is much cheaper than therapy.

That being said, it absolutely galls me that he lied to my face, at least twice, about issues I asked him about directly. It also galls me that he would have the nerve to be upset I was cheating on him, when he cheated on me what appears to be the entire length of our relationship. This wasn’t just some fling, a one night stand. He had a full relationship with me, and a full relationship with someone else. At least one someone else. Who knows, there may be more. I have no way of knowing.

(more to come…)

7 responses to “The End (AKA Part 3)

  1. Wow.

    I’m so sorry to hear about this turn of events. I never would have expected such a bizarre explanation regarding his disappearance. I’m guessing he slunk away when the other woman told him that she’d e-mailed you, and he decided it would be easier to run away than to face the music.

    This poses a question that I can’t help but ask (please forgive my being intrusive), but… since you’ve met his friends… did they know about the other woman (women), as well?

    You deserve better. You’re in my thoughts. Shout out if you need to; we’re here for you.

  2. I hate this. I must say I was always a bit suspicious of The Pilot’s behavior. I would not be surprised if he is stringing along 3 or 4 women. He sounds like a serial adulterer. I hope the woman you spoke to makes him wear a condom.

  3. So many words, so little time, and they all come back to a virtual-hug anyway– so…


    You don’t know how amazingly strong you are. Hurting, sure, but hurting just means you have heart. And having heart means EVERYTHING.

    Love you sugars—

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  5. I cant believe that this other woman has asked you to give her the honest truth ‘woman to woman’ and hasn’t given you the same respect! Maybe she is still reeling from the information and trying to come to terms with it…?

    I think someone OWES you a proper explanation! You are absolutely right to write about this openly, especially as she clearly reads your blog!!!

    What a spineless scum bag. I’m glad you have decided to do what’s right for you and move on… He doesn’t deserve you, or anyone to be honest!

    This other woman must have left him… If she hasn’t she is an idiot. He is a pathalogical liar by the sounds of it. Anyone who can lead a double life like that has no conscience whatsoever, and if she allows him to get away with it-he WILL do it again to her.

    • delightfuleccentric

      You know, I think that’s one of the top three issues I have with this whole situation. This happened to both me AND her, and I answered her questions honestly, and I expected the same from her.

      They are still together, if their profile pictures on Facebook are any indication. I don’t necessarily think she’s an idiot. I think he lied to her and told her I was a psycho, imagining myself in a relationship with him, and she beleived him. And it really irritates me, because he’s GETTING AWAY WITH IT.

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